Reverend Marci Scott-Weis, MDIV

Friends, today we turn our attention and intention to the topic of domestic and sexual violence. This is a difficult topic. As we do the important work of naming and opposing violence, again, please make your own well-being your priority. So why does it matter that we as a church turn our attention and intention to this topic this week?

It matters that we turn to this topic today because for centuries, our churches just like other structures, have been places where secrets were held, abuse occurred, and justice did not prevail. It matters that we turn to this topic today because we must be something different in this world for survivors of domestic and sexual violence. It matters that we turn to this topic today because it is critical in worship and in life that we stop and name that which breaks our hearts and makes us uncomfortable.

We turn our attention and intention to the topic of domestic and sexual violence today because our churches must be a place where we can safely name the all broken places, all the broken places in ourselves and in our world. We turn our attention and intention to this topic today because our churches must be a place where all feel safe and all feel heard.

The statistics on Domestic and sexual violence are staggering. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner. Each year, around 90,000 women are murdered around the world, and over a third of those were murdered by a current or former intimate partner. This means that, globally, six women are killed every hour by someone they know.

Additionally, more than one in three women, and one in four men, will experience some form of sexual or gender-based violence. In a study done by the United Church of Christ, it was found that the numbers of persons who have experienced sexual and domestic violence was consistent with the national average. That means that anywhere from 25 to 40% of the people in our pews and joining with us online have most likely experienced domestic or sexual violence. And even if it has not happened to us, chances are it has happened to someone we love.

Studies also show that 90 % of us pastors have not talked about domestic or sexual violence in our sermons. Many of us clergy struggle with bringing up uncomfortable subjects. What this means is that this lack of acknowledgment implies to survivors of violence that their pastors or their churches, are not safe places to seek support or be heard or to be believed. That simply must change and that is why be bring our attention and our intention to this topic today.

So today we lift our voices and our prayers to name that what is hard to name and that which is hard to listen to, the reality that domestic and sexual violence is real. As a church we must not fail by ignoring this reality. Ignoring it is the same as giving quiet consent.

As a church, we must stand firm in saying that we give witness to the God who stands with the wounded and weeps with us at the sight of violence and abuse and cries out for justice. As a church, we must testify that we will be a safe space for survivors of all violence. As a church, we must join our voices to the chorus calling out for justice for all who have experienced domestic and sexual violence.
And as a church we must make visible the love of God but letting people know that we are cultivating safety and support within our walls and within our arms. We embody the love of God by letting people know that as a Christian community, we are called to consider how we use the power and authority we have been given for compassion, protection, and mutual respect in all relationships.

We can stand with and for survivors of domestic and sexual violence as a church and we can stand with and for survivors as individuals. We EACH have the power and the responsibility to be the church in this world for survivors of domestic and sexual violence. We can do this by believing and trusting the stories shared with us. We can embody the compassionate love of God when we honestly recognize how frightening it is to step forward and share those sacred stories. We can be the church in this world when we listen and assure survivors that it is not their fault. We can embody the love of God by serving as witnesses to stories of abuse and honoring the voice of the victim and the courage in the telling of that story.

We can also enact the love of God by understanding that these kinds of wounds and memories do not ever go completely away. While a journey of healing and forgiveness may occur, it will never be about condoning or forgetting. We can embody the love of God by accompanying those abused in their healing journey, walking alongside, supporting, and loving them in their journey of healing. And as a community of faith and as individuals, we can practice the sacraments of presence and compassion in the face of injustice. With open arms and open hearts, we can work toward a more just, peaceful world for every child of God.

The reality of domestic, sexual and gender-based violence is sobering and staggering across the world. Today we lift our voices and our prayers to name that what is hard to name and that which is hard to listen to. We do this because it is critical for Church to be a place where we can safely and honestly name the broken places, all the broken places in ourselves and in our world.

It is critical that we embody the love of God for all victims and survivors of domestic and sexual violence by our words and our actions in order to move towards a more just and peace-filled world for every one of God’s beloved children. It is critical that we as the church, be the church in this world, making safe places for healing and transformation for all survivors of violence. And it is critical that we as the church be a place where all feel safe and all feel heard.

And so I close today speaking to those of you present here who have survived or are surviving any form of domestic or sexual and gender based violence…

Please know this, this is not what God wants or wanted for you. You are beloved. You are cherished. I believe with all within me and all that guides me, that God intends for you to be well and whole and to flourish in this world. Please know this, you are not blame, what happened is not your fault. You are the beloved of God.

And I believe you, your story matters. If you need a safe place to talk, I will listen. If you need someone to stand in the darkness of memories with you…I will be your witness. I will stand with and for you. If you need someone to honor your rage or any other emotion you may have, I will be present with you. If you need someone to celebrate your healing, I will sing praises with you. If you need someone to accompany you on that journey to wholeness and flourishing where you dance in the Beloved’s being, I will walk with you.

Please know this, you are the beloved of God, you are safe here and your story is honored here, all of you and all of your story, beloved of God, is safe and honored here.

Amen